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February 22, 2010
A yaya-less survival guide
Text by Maan D’Asis Pamaran
As I write this piece, my four sons are dozing off, worn out by a day of play and chores. We have had no yaya for two months, and counting. This is not the first time that we have had no help, but we have survived each helper-less episode, and we are sure to come out from this one unscathed as well.
To be sure, one of the first things that any mom who migrates to another country misses is the extra help. But then, they have vacuum cleaners, dishwashers, and washing machines and all kinds of stain-busting solvents, and spray-on/wipe-off cleaners to do almost all the heavy manual labor for them. Here, without a yaya, we need a little bit more of elbow grease.
But yaya’s usual alibi of “leaving to go home to the province to look after a sick father/mother/lolo or insert excuse here” should not send moms—especially stay-at-home mommies—into a panic. Here is a survival guide for those stretches of time when you find yourself without a pair of extra hands. Some tried and tested tips I would like to share:
• Do your prep work. Do you have to get up early to prepare the kids for school? Make sure their uniforms are pressed and snacks for baon (or at least the ingredients) are ready the night before. This would minimize your having to run around like a headless chicken in the morning.
It would also be good to have something marinating in the ref, such as pork chops or chicken, for instant frying if you run out of time to prepare lunch.
• Draft a menu. Since you probably can’t go to the grocery or wet market as often as you would want, try to prepare a menu that includes snacks for the whole week and buy the items that you need to prepare the dishes.
When it comes to cooking, it would also help if you broaden your horizons. If you already have one perfect signature dish (which is hopefully more than chicken nuggets or instant noodles), add three or four more to the mix. Consult cookbooks and ask friends for recipes of easy-to-prepare nutritious meals.
• CLAYGO. I am actually borrowing the Jollibee mantra of Clean As You Go. When you see objects that are out of place, like toys that strayed away from the toy basket, or clothes that belong in the laundry hamper, pick ‘em up and dump them where they belong. This way, they won’t pile up until you are faced with a Mount Everest of mess. This also goes for the leftovers in your ref, and any clutter that you make in the kitchen.
• Soak the stains. If your child comes home from school or play, get his clothes and soak them in a soapy solution. This will loosen the dirt and stains, so you won’t have to scrub so hard when it is time to do the laundry.
• Go easy. If there are products that promise to do a better/more efficient job for cleaning or laundry chores, then you might want to think about investing in them. They might be a tad more expensive, but if they can shave off a little of your chore-time, then maybe it will be worth it. After all, you are saving on a yaya’s salary and meal budget.
• Take baby steps. Nobody expects you to tackle all the house cleaning, laundry, cooking, and child care at one go. Prioritize your tasks, with the kids always coming first. You can mop the floors or scrub the bathroom after your child has gotten over his tantrum, or maybe when the baby is asleep.
• Train your little helpers. I’ve found a good, cheap source of manual labor—my own kids. My eldest, who’s 8, already knows how to set the table and clear the dishes after meals. I could also trust him to go to the sari-sari store with a list of items we need. The other two, who are 4 and 3, are in training for toy pickup duty. My youngest, who’s 1 1’ΕΡ2, is being trained to wait if I’m busy at a task. Sometimes they will, sometimes they won’t. But don’t get frustrated if they don’t. They’ll get it eventually. Always remember that you have to reward your helpers, with a kiss, hug, high-five, and occasional ice cream cones, so they will be motivated to keep doing a good job.
• Take a break. Sundays could be reserved as family days, where you could order-in or just take the whole family out for lunch or dinner. If you feel worn-out at the middle of the day, take a power nap. On not-so-busy days, schedule a massage at your favorite spa to treat those aching joints. By all means, keep the TV tuned to your sappy telenovela while you wash the dishes. Keep yourself healthy—and sane—so you are strong enough to face another day of household duties.
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